By Terin Frodyma on SwimSwam
So few can begin to understand the feelings and emotions of being a sibling to an Olympic champion. In the case of Alison Kos, the 15-year-old sister of Hungarian star Hubert Kos, it is about having her own identity and pursuing her goals, while being measured against her own flesh and blood in the process.
Kos delivered an emotional and deeply personal message at the TEDx event at the American International School of Budapest, titled “Find Your Pool: Turning Pressure Into Purpose”.
Kos opened up with a recollection of the men’s 200 backstroke final in Paris, where her brother went on to become an Olympic champion.
“I think it’s most athletes’ biggest dream to win an Olympic gold medal, and to have a brother that won it is a great feeling and is really special to me,” Kos said. “It gives me the confidence that I am able to do this as well.”
The success of her brother, while monumental, also began to change her life following those Olympic Games.
“At my first race after the Olympics, nothing really changed… It’s just that many people came up to me asking me these questions [like], ‘Oh, are you Hubi’s sister? [and] What’s it like being an Olympic champion’s sister?’ and to be honest, ot does get annoying after a while,” she said.
But the race was still the focus for Kos.
“I jumped in the pool, and I swim my race, and all I can think about is the present moment and what I need to do now.”
Following her performance, she met with her coach and discussed the questions she was asked before her race, which “annoyed” her.
His response was one that changed her way of thinking, “ He tells me, ‘oh, well, you’re not Hubi’s sister, you’re Aison Kos’,” she said.
Kos noted that professional athletes tend to fail at a higher rate when others set high expectations for them. She even openly admits that she has been dealing with this same feeling since Hubert’s crowning Olympic achievement.
“This is something that I’m going through right now and I did go through before. Whether it’s a race, or me just standing here right now… I have messed up a lot of races before in my past, and this is because I was scared of failure, and because I put myself under pressure because of my brother being an Olympic champion.”
In that same year, Hubert was the poster boy for the Short Course World Championships in Budapest. Meanwhile, Alison was preparing for a championship meet of her own, the Hungarian National Championships.
“I swam [the 200 backstroke], I didn’t swim a personal best. I was very disappointed in myself,” she said. “A week later, my brother Hubie went to the world championships and he won a gold medal, only 0.03 seconds off the world record.”
Hubert is not the only swimming brother of Alison; she describes Oli, her other brother who swims at Northwestern University, and his reasoning for heading stateside to further his career.
“He believed that if he goes to America, he will have a much bigger chance of pursuing his dreams of becoming an Olympic champion, because not many people believed in him here at home,” she said.
She described another study, talking about how pressure can both negatively and positively affect an athlete’s performance, explaining how “ there are some athletes that can turn pressure into motivation. They can help them bring the best out of themselves. But as I said before, there are many people or many athletes that performed very poorly under pressure because they overthink and they’re scared.”
She circled back to the simple words her coach had spoken to her after her race.
“After my coach told me these wise words many more times, that I’m not Hubi’s sister, I’m Alison, I came to the realization of what this meant,” she said. “I’m not doing the sport so I become like my brother. I’m doing the sport for myself to achieve my own goals and to achieve my own dreams.”
Her closing remarks were directed towards anybody dealing with pressure or stress.
“Find something that helps you get your mind off of things, like how the pool makes me [feel]. So, in other words, for me, that would mean, find your pool.”
Read the full story on SwimSwam: Alison Kos, Sister of Hubert Kos, Shares Powerful Message in TEDx Talk “Finding Your Pool”
